Archived Story

Dancing the tangled tango

Published 9:46am Tuesday, May 28, 2013

As part of the brash rash of wire-brush scouring on the Teflon coating that routinely seals the Obama presidency, a large heavy-duty cast-iron deal has been made of the IRS conducting audits on Tea Party-affiliated organizations. But scratch the surface and it makes a sort of perverse sense.

Tea Party and Associates are what you might call… anti-tax. Like meringue is anti-diet. So much so, they eschew the easy road by denying their name was taken from the early tax rebellion, but rather claim it an acronym of “Taxed Enough Already.” These guys are strict.

On the other hand, the IRS is, for lack of a better phrase, less anti-tax. You could go so far as to say the IRS is pro-tax.

Although employees undoubtedly consider their task following the letter of the law rather than the grisly art of squeezing blood from 300 million turnips. Type AB, Rh negative preferred, please.

These ornery combatants are mortal enemies along the lines of the mongoose and the cobra. Sheep and wolf. Electric vehicles and Oklahoma. Sarah Palin and The Learning Channel. Irish skin and Equatorial Guinea. The guy from IT support and everybody else in the fricking office. Pantyhose and coffee table corners. Cheese and cat hair.

Nobody wants the government targeting dissenters: that’s way too Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn. Uncomfortably reminiscent of Burma, and that doesn’t mean the romantic Pindaya Caves either. The 1984 Orwellian nightmare of Winston Smith revisited.

But neither should we forget the Tea Party’s stated goal is to shrink the government and get rid of the IRS. Then ostensibly teach the rest of us how to pave our own roads by making mud bricks in our ovens.

How difficult is it to understand that people whose philosophy preaches something is evil might garner a bit of extra scrutiny from the folks whose very jobs they are threatening?

Just like a “Legalize Pot” bumper sticker might prompt a cop to sniff the air inside a car after he stops it. The same way you don’t mock the stewardess’s hairstyle within earshot then expect extra peanuts.

That’s not profiling, it’s human nature. A reflex. Common sense.

Besides, this isn’t two beloved groups we’re talking about here. The Tea Party versus the IRS. It’s a battle for the bottom. The disdained versus the detested. A fight between stinky and yucky. With anybody caught in the middle destined to emerge with a few of the sticky bits on their shoes.

Out of 296 applicants not one Tea Party organization was denied nonprofit status. Admittedly, some had to wait. And that’s what the major charges boil down to: the IRS making things difficult.

Imagine that. An inconvenient interaction with the government.

Next thing you’ll try to tell me that insurance companies employ delaying tactics. Can’t wait for Obamacare to kick in, right?

But for now, the party has been put back into the Tea Party. They’re waving their flag of victimization wild and high and are once again protesting like its August of 2009. A Reenergized Tea Party: the last thing the Obama administration needs.

As a matter of fact the only people dreading it more would have to be the entire rest of the Republican Party.

 

Will Durst is a political comedian who has performed around the world. E-mail Will at durst@caglecartoons.com. Check out willandwillie.com for the latest podcast.

  • mickakers

    Please do a search on Emancipation Proclamation, Wikipedia has a good article.

    (Report comment)

  • mickakers

    As an interesting historical “fact”, President Abraham Lincoln and the Republican Party, at first only freed the slaves in the states who were in rebellion (Southern). The Northern States and the Boarder States, the parts that were under control of Union forces were exempted from this order. In other words, the Yankees could keep their slaves. I think there was a bit of Political expediency going on here, not moral fortitude.

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    THE REPUBLICAN PARTY

    Yes, the republican party of 150 years ago was perfectly respectable. Only recently has it become a haven for racists, corporate thievery, gun nuts, fundamentalist wackos and imbeciles.

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    Quick question, mikehaney…exactly how is retardicans’ obsession with gynecological issues – and their efforts to conjure up an Obama scandal – supposed to help the American people? Having lost the popular vote in five out the last six presidential elections, wouldn’t you’d think they’d at least try to appear concerned about the things the rest of us are concerned about?

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    In Lincoln’s time, 10% of the US population where slave owners; 90% were not. At that time there was not a huge call to free the slaves but just to stop the legality of slaves in newly forming northwest states.
    Guess what newly formed party Lincoln decided to join. THE REPUBLICAN PARTY.

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    LOL…you’d be nearly right if you changed that to: republican party (tea party included) is pro-birth (NOT pro-life, not by a long shot), for assault weapons, for lower taxes (for the rich), anti-union (and therefore anti-middle class and anti-working families)…you’ve been totally brainwashed by the brain-dead.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    Billion dollars of forced union dues(backing Obama) out the proverbial window.
    ————————
    Unions, who were the main financial backers and supporters of Democrats and the unfortunately named The Affordable Care Act, thought themselves immune, they were too big to fit under the proverbial bus of Obamacare, with the rest of us, the “unwashed masses” living in a parallel universe. They were wrong.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    Fact–Democratic party,Obama,unions are Pro-abortion,anti family,anti 2nd amendment,higher taxes.

    So far–Republican party platform(tea-party included) are pro-life,pro-family,for 2nd amendment,for lower taxes,anti forced union dues.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    While administration will try to duck the allegations, the smoking gun, NBC revealed, is that Holder actually approved the order to spy on Rosen. After NBC broke the story, agency officials admitted Friday (while the rest of America was out buying hamburgers and potato salad) that Eric Holder had, in fact, “personally vetted and approved a warrant” targeting Rosen as a “criminal co-conspirator” to gain access to his personal email. So not only did he have knowledge of the investigation, he authorized it! According to his own department, Holder’s fingerprints are all over a probe he swore that he had never even heard of.

    (Report comment)

  • mickakers

    keta; As an afterthought, you might find Mary Harris Jones interesting, she was a School Teacher. I found insight in your comment “we’re at the end of the fossil fuel era. Our energy sources have to become less toxic and deadly, despite Fox News and Exxon-Mobil’s stranglehold on our elected representatives.”

    (Report comment)

  • mickakers

    mikehaney; I find your anti-union sentiment rather interesting, in particular, due to your Irish heritage. Please do a search on The Molly Maguires, Terence Vincent Powderly and last but not least, Mary Harris Jones (Mother Jones), my favorite. Then do a search on The Irish And The American Labor Movement, click on The Irish And The American Labor Movement-Irish Cultural Society. The Irish people have been at the forefront of the Labor Union Movement due to the discrimination they experienced in the Job Market when they faced advertisements and signs, saying, “Irish Need Not Apply”. The Labor Unions have been the salvation of the working man and woman. Without them, we would be the indentured servants and slaves of the Industrial Barons and they’re associates.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    Without comment the United States Supreme Court today refused to consider Indiana’s appeal of a lower court decision that struck down a state law that denies Medicaid funding for businesses and organizations performing abortions, except for hospitals or ambulatory surgical centers. The challenge to the 2011 law came from Planned Parenthood Indiana (PPIN), represented by attorneys from the American Civil Liberties Union of Indiana and the Planned Parenthood Federation of America.

    PPIN is Indiana’s largest abortion provider, performing more than 5,000 abortions each year.

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    But standing in the way is a flurry of anti-fracking bills
    ———————————————————-

    LOL….when a comment is word-for-word from FOX News, as this one is, shouldn’t you include some kind of disclaimer, like “This message was brought to you by Exxon-Mobil and tar sands pipeline ruptures”? Pssssst…mikehaney…we’re at the end of the fossil fuel era. Our energy sources have to become less toxic and deadly, despite FOX News and Exxon-Mobil’s stranglehold on our elected representatives.

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    ICE was even prepared to offer government-sponsored hormone therapy for transgenders
    ———————————————————–

    As I’ve mentioned before, you’d be better informed if you watched the Cartoon Network instead of FOX News. Transgenders who’ve begun hormone therapy have been allowed to continue to receive it for nearly a decade. It isn’t “liberals” idea; it’s a Bureau of Prisons rule. So is the rule that allows abortions for immigrants in detention, in cases of rape, incest, or conditions that endanger the life of the mother. Another thing you’re wrong about is this: the majority of immigrants being detained aren’t criminals. They’re in the process of being sent elsewhere, period. Instead of attaching this kind of brainless teaparty nonsense to spending bills, wouldn’t it be great if retardicans would create a few jobs?

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    It’s obvious. More jobs, fewer democrat voters.
    ————————————
    California is on the verge of a new gold rush. Expanded hydraulic fracturing — or “fracking” — at the Monterey Shale formation is sparking estimates that 15 billion barrels of oil could be accessed, along with millions of jobs and huge contributions to the domestic energy supply.

    Even the state’s green-friendly Democratic governor, Jerry Brown, says “the potential is extraordinary.”

    But standing in the way is a flurry of anti-fracking bills. At last count, 10 were on the table, all introduced by Democrats seeking tighter controls.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    Party of the downtrodden.
    ——————–
    Liberals are more than happy to welcome illegal immigrants to America–it’s their unborn children they object to. Last week, Democrats tried to defend taxpayer-funded abortion as part of the long list of “perks” that detainees enjoy in Homeland Security’s federal detention centers.

    The issue boiled over last spring when the office of Immigrations and Customs Enforcement (ICE) tried to slip new guidelines past Congress that would have extended a host of benefits to illegal aliens that rival the average citizens’! And these aren’t your garden variety detainees. Most of the immigrants in ICE’s care are convicted criminals who were transferred out of prison, where they were serving time for other charges. Even so, the Left has fought to give these detainees the best care that (taxpayers’) money can offer. ICE was even prepared to offer government-sponsored hormone therapy for transgenders!

    (Report comment)

  • keta

    anti family, anti 2nd amendment, higher taxes
    ———————————————————-

    Bull. The party that’s trying to save the middle class is the polar opposite of “anti-family”. Everything that BUILT a middle class was the work of progressive Democrats, beginning with the notions that little kids should go to school instead of working in mines and factories, and that being old shouldn’t mean being poor. I’ve never understood how a party that that is the deadly enemy of poor women and children could call itself “pro-life”. And FYI, supporting background checks and believing that we don’t all have a constitutional right to own a closetful of military grade weapons ISN’T being anti-second amendment, moron.

    (Report comment)

  • mikehaney

    Fact–Democratic party,Obama,unions are Pro-abortion,anti family,anti 2nd amendment,higher taxes.

    So far–Republican party platform(tea-party included) are pro-life,pro-family,for 2nd amendment,for lower taxes,anti forced union dues.

    (Report comment)

  • mickakers

    Will Durst; An excellent article. Shades of the truth rather than comic. The Tea Party is a detriment to the betterment of this country. They are one of the most radical, self-centered groups I have ever seen, completely lacking in care and concern for the less affluent members of our society. Worldwide, they give this country a black eye.

    (Report comment)

Editor's Picks

Special needs camp teaches bike-riding

HUNTINGTON, W.Va. — The father didn’t want anyone to see, so he tried to casually brush them away. But the tears that welled in his ... Read more

Antique equipment shows off history

Ohio lies in a unique position within the United States, with part of the state situated in the Mid-West and the southeastern portion of the ... Read more

Unexpected heroes

Passersby help people trapped in burning house   Heroes don’t always wear capes, uniforms or badges. They aren’t always scanning the skies, or roaming alleyways ... Read more

Rescuer tries to save orphaned fawn

ROME TOWNSHIP — A hunter taking a deer out of season Monday afternoon left two orphans — one apparently lost to the woods and the ... Read more  | 2 comments