After a few weeks, I can finally admit it. I received my first driving under the influence charge recently. Then, minutes later, I received my second, third, fourth, fifth …

At some point I lost count.

In the course of a few hours, I went from a mild-mannered newspaper publisher to a habitual DUI offender.

Now before rumor central begins spinning the tale into the stuff of small-town legend, let me explain a bit.

It started out simply enough. Teresa Moore, one of our best reporters here at The Tribune came up and said, (I'm paraphrasing) "What are you doing Saturday night?"

Before I knew it I was on the telephone with Capt. Jerry Leach with the Ironton Police Department.

Leach's message was clear: He wanted to get me drunk.

It wasn't that Leach had it in for me personally or the newspaper, in fact, he was seeking my inebriated help.

In addition to his duties as with the Ironton Police Department, Leach is also a police academy instructor, which was the reason he needed help. He needed a few drinking guinea pigs and I looked like the perfect candidate to help him teach his students how to administer field sobriety tests.

He sought someone who doesn't drink much to show the students that a person's motor skills can be diminished to dangerous levels even when their blood alcohol content (BAC) levels are not at the legally drunk limit.

Let me just say that despite what some folks may think, drinking at the police station is a little weird and it is certainly no romping party.

Three guinea pigs arrived that night: a woman who works in the prosecutor's office, a federal agent and myself. (The names of the other guinea pigs are omitted to protect their innocence).

After slugging back several beers, we each went in and blew into the intoxilizer machine.

My first test, I think (remember my memory is a bit fuzzy), was 0.06. Legally drunk is currently 0.10, soon to be 0.08.

A quick walk/stumble down the stairs into the basement of the City Center, and it was show time.

For the next two hours, bright-eyed students, some already working as law enforcement officers, others hopeful to do so soon, stared at us and made us walk imaginary lines, stand on one leg and follow objects through the air with our eyes.

Each test intended to probe for a sign that we were intoxicated.

Although I never was "officially" drunk, at some points, I know (and the tests proved) I had no business trying to operate a motor vehicle.

And aside from being able to recite the field sobriety tests almost by heart, I learned two other valuable lessons: One doesn't have to be drunk in order to be dangerous behind the wheel, and our police officers have a much more difficult job than most of us realize.

Kevin Cooper is publisher of The Ironton Tribune. He can be reached at (740) 532-1445 ext. 12 or by e-mail at kevin.cooper@irontontribune.com.