Warning. This is not a paid advertisement, though in parts it may appear so.

Customer service. It’s a phrase that like many things in life we often take for granted. It’s one of those things you don’t miss until it’s gone.

Anyone who has ever witnessed excellent customer service firsthand knows how incredible it makes you feel.

Walk into Unger’s Shoe Store in downtown Ironton and you’ll see great customer service – it gushes there. A co-worker’s child recently had to have surgery and a potentially terrifying ordeal was made much easier, he said later, because of the staff at Three Gables Surgery Center.

I started thinking how precious it is to have good, locally operated businesses in our county last week while I was several hundred miles away.

I’m not certain what triggered the ordeal. I’ve thought back to every word I could remember saying, but none seemed worthy of mistreatment.

I was standing a car rental counter in the Norfolk, Va., airport when it started.

The name of the company? Well, let’s just say the company’s disparaging use of a great starship’s name would mortify Star Trek characters Capt. James T. Kirk and Dr. Spock.

Once I gave the woman at the count my name, the insulting hilarity ensued.

"Does your company have a corporate account with us?" she asked.

"No," I replied. "I don’t think so."

Minutes seemed to pass as the clicking of the keyboard continued on a futile search for some corporate identity.

"Could we just assume that, as I believe, we do not have a corporate account?" I asked, using my most polite voice.

"Tchh," came the disgusted sound from the clerk’s pursed lips. Eyes rolled and keyboard clicked with a decidedly faster clip and a vengeance in their chatter. I quickly glanced at my traveling companion, our ad director Dave Evans.

"Would you like to upgrade for just $4 more a day?" she asked, looking off into space, obviously trying to avoid eye contact.

"No, thank you," I said determined not reward her bad behavior.

"You do want the full coverage, don’t you?" she quizzed.

"Nope. I’d like to decline the coverage," I said.

"How do plan to protect against damages?"

"I’ll use my own insurance."

This went on for a while, and I was directed with a mumble to where I’d pick up the vehicle.

Upon arrival, the insults just kept flying. A sharply dressed young man, who could have just stepped out of the pages of one of those men’s magazines, approached.

"Hey, fellas, how are y’all doing this evening?" he said. "You guys are in … you guys are in the Lancer?" he said almost with astonishment.

"Didn’t they talk to you about the upgrades inside?" he said with a hopeful look on his face.

"Yep, we declined," I said defiantly.

"OK. You guys declined coverage, too?" he said as his jaw dropped. "That scratch right there would cost you a $500.

"Yes, we did," with a non-conformist’s grin growing on my face. "I’m aware of the risk."

As we sped into the night, we chuckled at the comedy of it all. Then, as we climbed in the next morning, I was grossed out a bit when I saw one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever seen in a rental car – hair. It wasn’t just a little hair, but lots of the stuff, stuck to the top of the car’s headliner. Nasty.

Hmm, I wonder if Joe Unger has ever thought about opening up a car rental place in Norfolk? I hear the market is ripe for takeover.

Kevin Cooper is publisher of The Ironton Tribune. He can be reached at (740) 532-1445 ext. 12 or by e-mail to kevin.cooper@irontontribune.com.