Goober reflects on the early unexpected results of NFL
Welp, the NFL season has been doin’ its usual hard to figure out stuff agin this year. Except maybe fer the Browns. Let’s face it. Despite all the hype in the media, Browns’ fans have heard the team cry wolf so many times they just turn a deaf ear.
Now, we knew they Bengals might be bad, but not winless. Are you sure Hue Jackson ain’t still coachin’ there?
It’s gotten so bad that the Bengals don’t even have a web page any more. Sees, they can’t seem to string 3 Ws together.
And then there is the Steelers and their fans. What do you call 53 Steelers in a basement? A whine cellar.
What did the smartest Ravens’ player git on his ACT test? Drool.
And in case of a tornado, head for the Redskins’ stadium. They’ve never had a touchdown there.
What do you call a genius sittin’ in the Dallas Cowboys’ fan section? A visitor.
How many Miami Dolphins does it take to change a tire? One, unless it’s a blowout and then they all show up.
Heck, I’d just call Charlie’s Tire. They comes and fixes it on the spot.
Ennywho, last week I wuz 9-2 to bring the season mark to 65-22. Let’s see if we kin git a perfect week fer once.
Rock Hill at Ironton: This one will be the run vs. the run (and maybe a little passing). But football wuz invented as a runnin’ game. Ironton 31, Rock Hill 14.
Coal Grove at Gallipolis: It rained early in the week so the Hornets is gonna love playin’ in the swamp. Gallipolis 27, Coal Grove 13.
Fairland at South Point: This a game where the Stitt is It. Michael Stitt, that is. Fairland 33, South Point 14.
Chesapeake at Portsmouth: This will be the speed of the Panthers tryin’ to out-do the speed of Talyn Parker. Portsmouth 44, Chesapeake 41.
Symmes Valley at Beaver Eastern: It wuz a few years ago that Rusty Webb got his 100th career win on a Saturday at Eastern. This time is no milestone but it will be No. 122. Symmes Valley 26, Eastern 18.
Ports. Notre Dame at Green: Look fer the Bobcats to bounce back and stay in the SOC and playoff hunt. Green 36, Notre Dame 20.
OTHERS: Northwest over Sciotoville East; Waverly over Lucasville Valley; Minford over Portsmouth West; Wheelersburg over Oak Hill; Ashland over East Carter; Russell over Greenup County.
Gridiron Goober is a self-proclaimed high school football expert who shares his vast knowledge and picks each week, all while offering a humorous take on the world of sports.