Goober’s cousin prefers horses

Published 12:25 am Thursday, September 27, 2018

Welp, ya’ll knows I is all about football. But I had this cousin who wuz really into horses.
Seems he bought this really fast race horse he planned to run in the Kentucky Derby.
The guy that sold him the horse said his trainer was a little odd and used the commands cherry pie for stopping and Thank God for giddy up.
Muh cousin asked to take the horse on a test run to make sure he wuz as fast as they said since they wanted so much money fer it.
My cousin took off on a dirt road and got the horse goin’ pretty darn fast. He wuz havin’ a lot of fun and he knew this horse could flat run. But then it happened.
Him and the horse were drawin’ near a cliff. My cousin began yellin’ “Whoa. Stop. Halt,” but the horse ran even faster. Then he remembered the command and said “Cherry pie!” just two feet from the edge of the cliff.
My cousin gave a sigh a relief, looked up toward the heavens and said, “Thank God!”
We is plannin’ his wake sometime next week.
Ennywhooo, last week I done went 11-3 to make the season record 58-15. Some pretty tough matchups this week so I ain’t real confident in muh picks.
Chesapeake at Ironton: One thing that continues to keep risin’ is the fact Ironton probably has the best talent in the OVC. But don’t tell that to Chesapeake. Ironton 28, Chesapeake 21.
Portsmouth at Coal Grove: I is expectin’ this one to be a shootout. The Hornets has a bunch of skilled players and the Trojans have Talyn Parker and Tyler McCoy. Coal Grove 41, Portsmouth 40.
Rock Hill at South Point: Redmen have to shore up the defense. Offensively, they just keeps runnin’ and runnin’ and teams just can’t seem to stop them. Rock Hill 42, South Point 19.
Fairland at Gallipolis: Talk bout lookin’ in the mirror. Both teams has a quarterback who kin run and throw. Both teams likes to throw but will run. This one gits crazy. Gallipolis 49, Fairland 42.
Beaver Eastern at Symmes Valley: Them Vikings is young, but they seems to be a game bunch. Symmes Valley 18, Eastern 14.
Green at Portsmouth Notre Dame: Bobcats scored late two weeks in a row to win close games. Ain’t gonna be a third time. Green 36, Ports. Notre Dame 7.
OTHERS: Sciotoville East over Northwest; Wheelersburg over Oak Hill; Waverly over Lucasville Valley; Portsmouth West over Minford.
Gridiron Goober is a self-proclaimed high school football expert who shares his vast knowledge and picks each week, all while offering a humorous take on the world of sports.

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