Michael Reagan: Politicians’ brains are a bipartisan problem

Published 12:00 am Thursday, September 7, 2023

Seriously folks.

Maybe we Republicans better stop banging on Old Joe Biden for the serious cognitive issues he obviously has.

Unless we hold the players on our own team responsible for their cognitive issues, we have to stop harping on the obvious mental declines of President Biden, Senator John Fetterman of Pennsylvania and Diane Feinstein, my home state’s ancient senator.

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I’m talking of course about the problem of what to do about Sen. Mitch McConnell’s shaky brain.

The Republican Senate minority leader had another one of his sad and scary public freeze-ups while talking to the press on Wednesday.

McConnell suddenly went silent on camera and stared into the distance after being asked whether he plans to run for re-election in 2026.

Mitch came out of his trance-like state in less than a minute, but the public damage to his image was done.

The 81-year-old Kentucky senator showed the entire world that he’s eligible to move into the Republican wing of the newly built Bidenland Rest Home, where the president, Fetterman and Feinstein are charter residents.

Don’t look now, but the greatest country in the world is being led by a bunch of cognitively “challenged” politicians you wouldn’t trust to walk your dog.

The collective cognitive ability of the Biden-McConnell-Feinstein-Fetterman foursome is about half that of the average person they represent.

It’s not funny, but if a comedian in a club simply put their photos up on a screen together he’d get big laughs.

McConnell’s doctor later issued a statement saying everything’s OK with Mitch’s brain. We all know that’s the usual bought-and-paid-for lie, but it’s the bipartisan way it works.

The doctors, staff people and political pals of ancient politicians in both parties automatically lie through their teeth and insist their bosses’ broken brains are still in tip-top shape.

That’s why Ted Cruz quickly defended McConnell’s mental competence and why the likes of Chuck Schumer and the liberal media stick up for Biden’s every time he says something daffy or untrue.

The truth is, people in power never want to voluntarily step down or step aside.

They never say, “You know what? I’m a million years old and my brain is like a two-year-old’s. After six decades in office, I realize it’s time for me to let someone under 85 do my job. So for the good of the country, I resign.”

Instead, they keep running for office — and we keep electing them.

But I don’t care who it is, what party they belong to or how the political equation in Washington will be affected.

It’s time for a collective bipartisan call for McConnell, Feinstein, Fetterman and Biden to do the right thing and step down.

They’re making decisions and voting on things every day that affect every one of our lives and yet half the time they have no idea what they are doing.

They’re not able to do the jobs they were elected to do. They’re embarrassing themselves. They’re ruining their legacies, which, whatever they are or once were, are long gone.

They’re only going to be remembered how they are now, which is incompetent and addled, not how they were long ago when they started to play the Washington game.

I admit to my guilt. I’ve gone after Biden because of his cognitive disabilities. But if I am going to bang on Biden, I cannot not bang on McConnell.

Because it’s not about the good of the party, it’s for the good of the country.

Michael Reagan is the son of President Ronald Reagan, a political consultant, and author. Send comments to Reagan@caglecartoons.com.